I'm not that girl....

So one quick important thing....I filled out all of my forms for graduation....I'm graduating in December!! It may not seem like a huge deal cause we figure, yeah most people graduate college, but not in my family. It's a pretty big deal to me--and I'm one of three cum laude in my college! I'm SO excited.

So, people always ask why I want to work for Disney. Why my dream is to be standing in the hot sun in one of those big hot costumes with so little pay? Truth is, I don't know if I can express my love for Disney with words....they're just too complicated. But I have always loved what magic cast members can spread and have always wanted to make a child smile. I am currently in a show called "The Kallahoney Kids vs the Shadow Monsters: A very nearly scary story with Jazz featuring the Lady Who Lives in the Curtains". -whew-. It's a childrens show and I play the Lady who lives in the Curtains. I love going out and greeting the kids afterward. I love making them laugh. Maybe it's what I was born to do. So being in those big costumes is still a dream because it's the chance to make a child laugh.

I look at pictures of girls who play princesses in the Disney parks and realize I will never be that girl. I'm not the gorgeous slim little thing with lustrous hair and a curvy waist. I never have been. I've been ok with that for most of my life.....until I realize what I want most might be blocked by my body. Don't get me wrong; I'm not huge and I don't have THAT bad of a self-image...so I don't want people rolling their eyes going "AniKa, shut up, quit being so down on yourself". It's just a fact I have come to face; I'm not that bodytype. It's not easy for me to lose weight and both my families have big hips and wide thighs.....it's my body type and it's not likely to change.
 SO. After I realized this, I decided I would start a new dream. And chase it. So I decided I would one day work in the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique (for those who do not know, it's a salon that does little girls' hair nails make-up, etc.) so I took a make-up class and tried to learn to do hair and learned face painting....and I prayed. I prayed sooooo hard for this role, I thought I had a chance. But I didn't get it. SO I can't help wonder what God has in store for me. Maybe there's a reason I didn't get BBB.....maybe something bigger is waiting for me. So I'm still going to audition for performer next week. I figured why not, if I don't pass the audition then I'm at least still in Disney! I'm nervous and terrified but I feel like I'm more prepared and I feel like this time will be different. Who knows! I don't necessarily want the beautiful princess....I'd be so happy with a sidekick or a villain or anything! Give me the random character people say "what movie was that one from??" and I'll be happy....I'll still be making kids laugh

:-)